Battling Busyness

In today's fast paced world, do we take the time to really enjoy?  Doesn't it seem like we all are constantly moving from thing to thing?  Is this constant busyness the kind of example that we want our children to emulate as adults?  Maybe it is this unusual winter, or just a frame of mind, but our focus has turned inward.  This is not to say that we have become hermits, or that we have stopped our involvement with friends, activities or the community.  Only that we are hanging hats at the door when we get home at night and really enjoying the time together, the simple pleasures at our own pace.

If you had to put together a short list of the important things for your family, what would you choose?  

The Gift of Flight

Have you ever had one of those conversations that came at you out of nowhere?  Over the weekend I did and it got me thinking, reminiscing really, about growing up and all of those things that shaped me as a person.  What I remember:

I remember family dinners around the kitchen table, every night.  

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Playing ball with my dad, brother, and the neighbor kids in the street.  

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Going to dance lessons with my mom, the adult class, every Tuesday night followed by Arby's.

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Long walks to the ice cream parlor, late on a summer night when it was too hot to sleep.

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Family vacations and holidays.

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Going to the pumpkin patch and playing hide and seek at the Christmas tree lot.

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Shopping with my mom (before the dreaded teen angst years), and loving every minute of it.

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Long hours spent with my mom drilling multiplication tables and thinking I'd never get it (I did).

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Hours volunteering with my mom and late nights slap happy laughing.

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Always hugs and I love you's.

These few things, among many, shaped who I would eventually be and reflect what is important to me. As the parent of two amazing, intelligent young children, my upbringing (as well as B's, who also comes from a strong sense of family), shape how important we view family.  We make sure that the kids know how very paramount family is, all family.  In our want to give them as carefree an experience as possible in what are sometimes, less than carefree times, we have created a life emulating those simpler things that we feel best bring us back to our childhoods. Times when free play, open space (I so remember the forts we would build on the vacant, tree shaded lots), running home to dinner in the evening, rosy cheeked and dirty, and most of all family, were pivotal to childhood.  The twenty-four hour news cycle, and volatile antics are merely distractions, and unfortunately sometimes profound ones, from those, most important life lessons that shaped my growing up years.  I hope that all of the efforts we go to, to teach our children about life, the importance of family and how to be open minded, and conscientious people will give them the foundation to make their own informed decisions and give them the wings to fly.  

What a beautiful gift I was given, flight.  Thanks mom & dad! 

This is my contribution to Jill's May challenge~ Childhood

It's not too late, there's a few days left to join in!!

A Difficult Decision

Our farming adventure dabbling in livestock with chickens has been rewarding and a huge learning experience for us and our daughter Sidney.  When we had our first predator problem, she was devastated. After time faded the wounds of losing something that she had raised, she began a quest that we never harm or eat any animal from our property. 

When one of our hens grew up to be a rooster last season, we warned her that if he turned out mean, he would have to go.  He developed a fair amount of sass, yet nothing compared to our first rooster (subject of above referenced predator problem), he was plain mean. "Feathertail" didn't bother us adults much, but challenged and went after the kids. We allowed him to continue on on a trial basis, for Sidney's sake.  Yesterday, when I went to collect eggs, he had gravely injured one of our hens.  We did all that we could for her, but it was too late.  Sidney referred to him as a "murderer" to one of her friends.  She knew he had to go, but we had to find a place for him. 

Today I checked around, but no one wants a rooster who is both aggressive to kids and hens, and I couldn't pass him off as some docile avian.  After much heartfelt discussion B and I made the decision to take him into work and euthanize him.  Then we had to decide whether to tell Sidney what we had done or to lie about it.  We feel strongly, especially with what we do for a living, not to pass it off to her as we 'sent him to the farm.'

Of course, the first words out of her mouth when I picked her up after school were, "did you find a farmer to take him?"  Once we had settled in the car, I explained to her that no one wanted an aggressive rooster, and I couldn't lie to someone and tell them he wasn't. She asked what we were going to do. I let her know that we had already made the decision.  That daddy had put him to sleep...not the 'farm way', but the way we put down dogs and cats, and he never knew. 

This was the moment that I was dreading.  She understands philosophically the circle of life and knew what needed to happen for every one's (especially her remaining hens) safety, but emotionally I was not sure how she would take it.  Her first spoken response, after an extended silence, was that we were selfish to put him down, and we should have called the school to tell her so she could talk us out of it.  I explained to her that we had few choices, it was a horrible decision, but we couldn't put anyone elses kids or her other hens in danger.  I also explained that we thought about talking to her first, but didn't want her to feel solely responsible for what the decision was ultimately going to have to be.  She thought about this, and to my surprise , accepted it. 

She spent some time in the barn with her hens this evening, the first time she has been able to go in by herself in a long time.  Now the fear of being attacked is gone.  The setting feels much more relaxed, and she has learned from, and I think found peace with, a very difficult decision.